What’s the Big Deal About Dads?
May 17th 2017
In Psalm 127:3 we learn, “Children are an inheritance from The Lord. They are a reward from Him.”
Clearly both moms and dads reap blessing from their children; however, the truth is a man stands to lose much more when he shirks parental responsibilities. Regrets are real and do-overs depend upon hurt abandoned children being willing to extend grace and forgive. Building a non-existent or broken relationship is hard even when everyone desires healing and restoration. Let's look at who father is, and why he is so important. Fathers are central to the emotional well-being of their children; they are designed by God to be capable caretakers, loving teachers and sane disciplinarians.
Many long term studies through the years clearly document kids whose dad abandoned them suffer more trauma and have a harder time in life. Boys with an absent father are more likely to drop out of school, join gangs, become addicted to drugs/alcohol and go to prison. Girls growing up without a dad tend to drop out of school, become addicted to drugs/alcohol, get into trouble with older men and have more children outside of marriage. In both cases the cycle of “no dad” begins all over.
People may not agree, but many years of valid, documented studies show the role of the father in a family is critical. Even a weak dad is preferable to none, so you don’t have to know everything at first. Dads can teach a son about being an honorable man…this is possible even if the dad has to learn first because no one was there for him. Dads can demonstrate to a daughter she is special and deserves to be treated well through his involvement in her life.
While almost any man can father a child, there is much more than a physical contribution at the time of conception. Being a dad in your child's life is important and rewarding work. But…let’s face it parenting which requires a dad to be present, involved and responsible is not easy. The path of least resistance: To cut and run requires nothing. However, there is no honor if you leave, and to change your mind will mean overcoming huge hurdles of resistance built up in others as a result of no track record of trust. Your reward is the result of your choice to think of and love your children more than hang out with your friends or avoid financial responsibility. Friends come and go. Your children will want to stick around when you’ve made yourself a part of their lives they can’t imagine living without. Imagine how much better to hear, “Dad, I miss you. How are you?” instead of “Dad, I’m calling from jail and can’t talk long.”
Regardless of the circumstances under which a child was conceived, the child is our future and your legacy. A choice made in haste based on personal preferences and finances will likely result in great sorrow and remorse. Instead of enjoying your child, you will continually look around and think “My child would be walking/talking/starting school/getting married about now.” To abandon your child means you will never experience anything more than regret.
Think about it. Never is a long, long time. It means…never!